4/22/11

Haunted

Spent every second online today listening to Taylor Swift's Haunted.. Realized that the lyrics are describing exactly what I'm feeling... Here are the lyrics..


You and I walk a fragile line
I have known it all this time
But, I never thought I'd live to see it break
It's getting dark and its all too quiet
And I can't trust anything now
And it's coming over you like it's all a big mistake

Oh, holding my breath
Won't lose you again
Somethings made your eyes go cold

Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Something's gone terribly wrong
You're all I wanted

Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this ?I thought I had you figured out
Can't breathe whenever you're gone
Can't turn back now
I'm haunted

Stood there and watched you walk away
From everything we had
But I still mean every word I said to you
He will try to take away my pain
And he just might make me smile
But the whole time I'm wishing he was you instead

Oh,I'm holding my breath
Won't see you again
Something keeps me holding on to nothing
Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this

I thought I had you figured out
Something's gone terribly wrong
You're all I wanted

Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this ?I thought I had you figured out
Can't breathe whenever you're gone
Can't turn back now
I'm haunted

I know, I know
I just know
You're not gone
You can't be gone
No

Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Something's gone terribly wrong
Won't finish what you started

Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this ?I thought I had you figured out
Can't breathe whenever you're gone
Can't go back
I'm haunted

You and I walk a fragile line
I have known it all this time
But, I never thought I'd see it break
Never thought I'd see it


The melody is beautiful.. And I can't stop listening to it..

Maybe the only thing I ever really wanted in my life is for someone to understand me...

Hence, when that's the only thing you really wanted, you get a song that's describing your feelings... no matter how many mistakes it has, it still deciphered part of your emotion right.. It just.. feels right. Listening to it, and thinking of all the people in the world that is doing the same thing that very moment.. It feels like I'm heard.. Like Taylor's singing out my story for everybody else to hear..


Truth be told, I am haunted.. I'm haunted by my past.. No matter how far I run, no matter how long I run, it always seems to be right behind me. Waiting for me to pause so that it can jump ahead of me to trip me into that black abyss again.. When will it ever stop??

Please... I'm so tired.. I can't catch my breath anymore... I'm tired of running away. I don't want to leave again.Stop. Please...

4/17/11

哭

是眼泪,憋太久了吗??不然为什么连小小的事,都能让久违的眼泪失去控制的划过脸庞。。是我变脆弱了吗?还是因为人真的需要哭??我不知道,也不想知道。没关系,把它看成磨练就好了,像制剑一样,需要让它在烧得通红后,一次又一次的把它浸到冷水中,让它变得坚强而柔软,不易断裂。能屈能伸嘛。。望向窗外的天空,心里想起最近反复无常的天气,应该是你在发脾气吧。。别这样,好不好?想我,就回来啊。。不要这样的,折磨自己。。